Christmas

IT'S FINALLY HERE, IT'S FINALLY DECEMBER!!!!! Which means it's the month of christmas! I swear nobody will understand my love for christmas. Even I myself don't know why do I love christmas so much! Christmas is a season of love, sharing, giving, receiving, every nice things that you could imagine!!

But what cracks my brain the most is still the gifts for my love ones. Every year i've been baking cookies! This year I wanna have something new but I just can't crack up any new ideas..... Gah.. Maybe I should still bake, but probably not cookies this time round? Nvm, i still have time to slowly brainstorm keke. And of course most people have their wish list for Christmas and here's mine!

# A sliver Mickey Mouse bracelet! I've been searching high and low for this bracelet for so long. I regretted so much for not buying the first time I saw and now it doesn't sell anymore!

# Load my closet with more knitted stuff! As I said I really really love knitted clothes! 1 or 2 is never enough!!

# Small couch in my room... As I'm redecorating my room, trying to make it even more comfortable!!

# Television!! I use to have it before I moved. Before that I didn't cherish the life of television in my room.. And now I'm dying to have it back. So I'm trying my best to be a little angel so papa will get it for me!! Huahuahua!

# Another pair of boots!

I have a perfect christmas in my mind.You see, I always wanted to go new york to celebrate christmas because their christmas spirits is like woaaaaah holy cow, damn uhsome! I really wish I can go there with my love one and spend the happiest moment of the month there and just go crazy!

Other than Christmas, there are a few things I'm looking forward to, too!

1) Genting Trip together with fei zai! Probably going there for a 5 days trip and hopefully can visit all the theme parks and after that we'll rent some DVDs to watch through the day! Sounds simple but yet so anticipating!!!

2) Upcoming outing with Buddyz even tho it's not plan yet but I've already got something in my mind and I hope it be a fruitful outing!

3) Gabby's birthday! I finally can meet all the people I haven't met for ages example weexin, lynn! Gaaaah.

4) Baking.. Yes trying hard to find a perfect goodie to bake is kind of a pain in the ass but I still enjoy the process of baking and listing down the people I've prepared for!

On the other note..

This few days I've been working and that day which obviously I can't remember when.. I met up with my favorite girl, Ashley. I swear to god we have so much to say and a day will never satisfy two gossip bitches. We walked around and talk about the usual thins and update what's going on in each others life. It's really a blessing to have someone like her in my life. Ok I'm getting mushy but it's true ok!

Then buddy came to meet me for lunch during my lunch break teehee. She was acting like a total idiot which I love it.

Another day, I manage to seek time to meet Zuyao and Jiaxin. Although it was a really short catch up but still fruitful tho! As usual zy pop out with dozens of questions again...

Another off day, had my nails painted together with yong and alex. Initially was suppose to accompany them for a job interview, apparently there was a sudden change of mind so in the end we went to walk around instead!

Popped by to have lunch with fei zai during his lunch break and show off my new phone to him muhahaha. After lunch...

I met up with my lovelies above ^^^^ Happy day because i shop, shop and shop! Apart from being so indecisive... everything was great!

During both of our off days........ Had tons of our things done and then finally our final destination... IKEA!!!


Ok i guess i'm done for today. Gna sort out some pictures for nowwwwww.

3.11

HELLOWELLOFELLOWS!

My exams are officially over and I smell my freedom but yeah sucks to say i've got to work. Right now I feel so empty because I don't have to study anymore but ya when it comes to study... i start whining like a little bitch.

Sometimes in life you met with so many unlucky stuff and suddenly something lucky happen to you and all you wish is that lucky thing that happen would stay and not go away. Then again i'll ask myself like, is this for real?

I am so lucky to have a bestfriend, Ashley. She really melt like heart like nobody else. Yeahhhh, kinda mushy but it's true. She don't judge like others do. She feel happy for me because i'm happy and not like some others who question and talk behind your back. This is what bestfriends are for isn't it? As well as Hanif, he will never judge and always lend me a ear if i need one. Then, to those who said they will stay and left, to those who said you will never betray... to be honest i have nothing to say but i'm kind of glad that i cancel you out of my life. Just like what they always say.. When shit happens, you know who are true to you.

So many happening things this days and i am content with my life and happy with what i have, who i have.

Goodnight for now x

1am

It's 1am and I feel sick. School later, what's new.

You know. Sometimes things are more simple than you think but our brains just decides to make it complicated. Yes shit on you brainz. We think too much, expect too much, want to much.

I miss those times where I was just 13 years old. Everything will peaceful and fine. Until I outgrew it and obstacles in life gushed towards me. I might be 18 now but I still act like a kid in front of my close friends and family. I may be mature at certain things but I'm still a kiddo at some situations.
During this period of time, I learn alot of things; respecting our elderly and parents, think about other instead of "I-Me-Mine", letting your mind run wild doesn't help, appreciated and cherish. This are just words but in order to put them into action is another thing to say. Well this kind of random topic but yeah, like what they say. You think alot at night so yeah here I am.

Well so I'm here giving my thoughts and saying thank you (I know I've repeat a number of times but trust me, I mean it). Thank you to those who stay in my life and be there for me. Sorry if I am a burden. Ok I know I am but I still hope people would stay.

That's about it I guess I should try to sleep.

Goodnight xo

Numb

Hi. Warning: this is going to be wordy, long, boring, whines.

I am upset and honestly I don't blame anyone, really. I only blame myself and I'm not trying get sympathy votes or shit like that. Seriously, I blame myself so much that I literally cry myself to sleep every night knowing the fact that there's nothing I can do.

If someone were to ask me how I feel, I have no fucking idea how to answer because even I myself, do not know how I feel. It's like there's a few roads in front of me to choose yet I still don't know where to go. This rojak feeling, I cannot express. It is not that I have no one to turn to, is that i don't know who can I turn to, I do not know who am i suppose to go to, who really know how I feel. But I know there are people who care for me, it's just like I say I don't know who to express myself to.

I am lost, lost for words, lost of motivation, lost hope. Even Dora the Explora knows where the fuck to go but not me. The only thing I see myself doing is burying myself in books trying to escape the entire world. I don't need someone to tell me where to go, what to do next. But, I just need someone to tell me I am not alone. I mean, admit it, everyone is afraid to be alone. You definitely wish someone is there with you to share your joy and tears. Be it friends or family. Just someone who really cares for you from the bottom of their heart.

I am messed up. My feelings is messed up. You know.. I rather know how I feel like sad, happy or whatsoever. Right now what's worst is not knowing how you feel. Yeah, son of a notch, fuck.

Also, I would appreciated people who don't question so much about my personal life. I have no answers to it. Your thoughts will be greatly appreciated. Thank you x

Banana (belated, again)

Hey guyz. Right, I've been leaving my blog dead due to examinations but I'm glad prelims are over and I finally have the time to switch on my computer after not touching it for weeks.

Guess what, I can't wait for my examination to end officially because I already have millions of plan running through my mind. I love making list and planning. So I already thought of what I'm going to do right after my examinations. It simple, I'll work my ass off, shop my ass off, get the heck out of Singapore for a little while. Meet everyone that I've not met in ages.

 So I spend a night at Maine's house. Drop by town to walk around, penniless.... Ate dinner and supper @ 85. Spazzing about my ideal guy, LOOOOOOL. And planning out next buddyz meeting. Woke up early in the morning despite sleeping late. Sigh... What to do when you're spending a night with a fucking healthy girl. Whenever I'm with her I just feel like a total sick child due to my unhealthy diet! Had a heavy breakfast and then back to her house.

Then it was my aunt's house warming.... Nothing much really.. And then next, study. Ahhh, what's new right. Really can't wait for exams to be over and done with!

Then next up will be my best bro's birthday.. Tan Jinteck!!!

 So I wanna take this chance to say... Thank you Tecki for being for there every time when I need someone, without fail. Giving me the best advice, listening to me and understanding me and being so straight forward. Bros like you are hard to find. xoxoxoxo!

Oh yeah, this is the teacher's day performance. I swear I need to get a new shoe because I almost slipped. Can't imagine how embarrassed I would be if I slipped in front of the entire school. :/ So here it is, I kind of screw up cos i'm feeling real nervous.............